If money is your hope for independence you will never have it. The only real security that a man will have in this world is a reserve of knowledge, experience, and ability.
- Henry Ford
Archive for December, 2006
Y-you’re a DUCK!
- many characters, Howard the Duck
Funnily enough, I know places like this…
Published by 1 year, 8 months ago in Miscellaneous. 0 CommentsNobody goes there anymore, it’s too crowded!
- Yogi Berra
Beverly Switzler: Waitaminit… we’re not supposed to be speaking, are we?
Howard the Duck (thinking): Why? Why should I care if I never see her again? What possible mutual attraction could rationally exist between a duck and — that? It defies every law of nature.
Beverly: Of course, I’m not inflexible. I might be persuaded… or charmed…
Howard (thinking): On the other hand, I’ve never felt constrained to follow convention!
Howard: What the heck. I guess it’s destiny, toots!
(they hug)
Howard (thinking): How could this be wrong — or insane — when it feels so good?
- Howard the Duck #6, Steve Gerber
Hello, operator, gimme the number for 911!
- Homer Simpson, The Simpsons
People are always asking me about Eskimos, but there are no Eskimos in Iceland.
- Bjork
The International Kidney-Poisoning Conspiracy
Published by 1 year, 8 months ago in Comic books. 0 CommentsI ride this bus all day — back and forth, back and forth — to protect my kidneys from you beasts! You and your tobacco — your deep-fried foods — your wanton women and low morals — your international kidney-poisoning conspiracy!
- the Kidney Lady, Howard the Duck #2, Steve Gerber
Death is inevitable. Our fear of it makes us play safe, blocks out emotion. It’s a losing game. Without passion you are already dead.
- Max Payne, Max Payne 2: The Fall of Max Payne
The day comes when Tiax will point and click!
- Tiax, Baldur’s Gate
If I’d asked people what they wanted…
Published by 1 year, 8 months ago in Industrialists. 0 CommentsIf I’d asked people what they wanted, they would have asked for a better horse.
- Henry Ford
Truth does not demand belief. Scientists do not join hands every Sunday, singing, “yes, gravity is real! I will have faith! I will be strong! I believe in my heart that what goes up, up, up must come down, down. down. Amen!” If they did, we would think they were pretty insecure about it.
- Dan Barker
This is his moment of truth. In one motion, he drops the wrench, ducks, and lunges for the mallet. The hellcow, too, hurls herself at her target — but misses, her cold, unmilkable udder barely brushing Howard’s feathery crown.
- narration, Giant-Size Man-Thing #5, Steve Gerber
And ye shall keep my statutes, and do them: I am the LORD which sanctify you.
For every one that curseth his father or his mother shall be surely put to death: he hath cursed his father or his mother; his blood shall be upon him.
And the man that committeth adultery with another man’s wife, even he that committeth adultery with his neighbour’s wife, the adulterer and the adulteress shall surely be put to death.
And the man that lieth with his father’s wife hath uncovered his father’s nakedness: both of them shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them.
And if a man lie with his daughter in law, both of them shall surely be put to death: they have wrought confusion; their blood shall be upon them.
If a man also lie with mankind, as he lieth with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination: they shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them.
And if a man take a wife and her mother, it is wickedness: they shall be burnt with fire, both he and they; that there be no wickedness among you.
And if a man lie with a beast, he shall surely be put to death: and ye shall slay the beast.
And if a woman approach unto any beast, and lie down thereto, thou shalt kill the woman, and the beast: they shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them.
And if a man shall take his sister, his father’s daughter, or his mother’s daughter, and see her nakedness, and she see his nakedness; it is a wicked thing; and they shall be cut off in the sight of their people: he hath uncovered his sister’s nakedness; he shall bear his iniquity.
And if a man shall lie with a woman having her sickness, and shall uncover her nakedness; he hath discovered her fountain, and she hath uncovered the fountain of her blood: and both of them shall be cut off from among their people.
And thou shalt not uncover the nakedness of thy mother’s sister, nor of thy father’s sister: for he uncovereth his near kin: they shall bear their iniquity.
And if a man shall lie with his uncle’s wife, he hath uncovered his uncle’s nakedness: they shall bear their sin; they shall die childless.
And if a man shall take his brother’s wife, it is an unclean thing: he hath uncovered his brother’s nakedness; they shall be childless.
- Leviticus 20:8-21
(emphasis mine)
My father was very strong. I don’t agree with a lot of the ways he brought me up. I don’t agree with a lot of his values, but he did have a lot of integrity, and if he told us not to do something, he didn’t do it either.
- Madonna
Tim, now a rather handsome six-foot carrot, laughed loudly and changed into a coiled parking meter. Frito, dizzy as a great wave of oatmeal flowed through his brain, grew heedless of the puddle of drool collecting in his lap. There was a noiseless explosion between his ears and he watched with terror as the room began stretching and pulsating like Silly Putty in heat. Frito’s ears began to grow and his arms changed into badminton rackets. The floor developed holes out of which poured fanged peanut brittle. A score of polka-dotted cockroaches danced a buck and wing on his stomach. A Swiss cheese waltzed him twice around the room, and his nose fell off. Frito opened his mouth to speak and a flock of flying earthworms escaped. His gall bladder sang an aria and did a little tap dance on his appendix. He began to lose consciousness, but before it ebbed completely, he heard a six-foot waffle iron giggle, “If yoo dig it now, jes’ wade till th’ rush hits you!”
- Bored of the Rings, Harvard Lampoon
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